THE GIFT OF THANKSGIVING

30 Rules for Thanksgiving Touch Football from Jason Gay in the WSJ.
 

1. It’s touch if you have a healthy, speaking relationship with your family. Its tackle (without Skwoosh gel pads) if you see each other once a year.
2. Keep the field size small, less than 100 yards long. If half the people in your family ran 100 yards they’d end up in the hospital.
3. Play before dinner. There will be no players available after dinner. Nobody can run in unbuttoned pants.
4. Everyone plays, parents, grandparents, uncles, cousins even Spot, the one eyed terrier. Spot’s the best wide receiver on the field (when he’s not cuddled up and napping on a gel office cushion).
5. The following are prohibited: spikes, sticky gloves, Smith jerseys, lit cigars and running with a martini. No Therapy gel cushions for protection allowed.
6. A Nerf ball is okay but a real leather football is classic. We’re waiting for a leather covered gel motorcycle seat.
7. No Frisbees, winged footballs or soft, lightweight gel travel cushions allowed.
8. Two hand touch is required.  One hand touch is for lazy folks who celebrate Thanksgiving at KFC.
9. Gay says two completions is a first down. He knows.
10. Save the taunting, cursing and back-handed compliments for the dinner table.
11. Playing in most of the country comes with “skwooshy” cold mud  inviting a family member to fall and ruin his or her Thanksgiving outfit. No penalty just one of the highlights of the game (Skwoosh washes easily).
12. Don’t baby the kids even your 7-year-old niece. It’s OK to intercept her pass and run it back for a touchdown. She has to learn when not to throw into triple coverage.
13. The count is five “Mississippi” a FULL four syllables not a quick “MISS-IPPY” and knocking gramps to the ground.
14. If you’re old enough to have grandchildren and you sack the quarter back and you do a sack dance you will be worshipped forever.
15. No, you don’t get to be “permanent QB” if you want anyone to like you.
16. No show-off football lingo like “trips left” or “zone blitz”. Uncle Earl wants to get the game over with, have a vodka and watch the game on TV sitting on his All Purpose Gel cushion from Skwoosh.
17. With the control freak uncle just listen to the elaborate plays and forget them ASAP.
18. There are only two plays in the game, “Everybody Go Out” and Everybody Go Deep”.
19. No, that running play never works. Ever.
20. QB’s be sure not to throw the ball too hard when you think you see an opening. Guaranteed you’ll peg Aunt Francis in the neck.
21.  Don’t be a wimp. A little pass interference never hurt anyone.
22. After you throw six interceptions let someone else play QB or sign with the Redskins.
23. Three-minute half time. Remember: if Daddy sits, Daddy is done.
24. If playing on the street, don’t dent the powder blue Cadillac. It belongs to Uncle Guido’s new wife and he’ll find you.
25. If you’re a Thanksgiving guest it’s your job to be good at touch football. Lie and say you played a little at OSU.
26. Punts are the hippopotamuses of touch football. Botched punts break more windows and dent more cars than any other play in the game.
27. If it snows while sitting in the bleacher seats the game’s a classic.
28. Be careful. You don’t want any injuries that can’t be treated with a bag of frozen peas and a SKWOOSH Gel Acupressure Pad.
29. If your team wins and stands undefeated please let LSU know that you’re available to play in the BCS championship.
30. In the end there is really only one rule for Thanksgiving touch football. Take your shoes off before you go in the house or Mom is going to kill you.

A Gift for Fishermen

Fishing from a kayak and enjoying the comfort and convenience of a Skwoosh gel kayak fishing seat isn’t anything like the adventures depicted on the TV show “Deadliest Catch”.  But it does validate ones deep interest in fishing, fishing safety and the place in man’s existence for both commercial and sport fishing.

Kayak fishing is a sport while commercial fishing, especially crabbing, is at the top of the US list of deadliest jobs, with a fatality rate 33 times above the average for US workers.  Contributing to these grim statistics was the old regulation which forced fishermen to race the clock to catch enough to pay expenses and make a profit before they had to stop once the entire fleet's limit was reached.  In the effort to control overfishing, an arbitrary fleet limit was set for each catch.  When the limit was reached all fishermen working that catch had to stop or face heavy fines.  This caused the great fishing race, often with disregard to safety by the contestants.  Thankfully today fishing is done under the catch shares system which divides up how many fish the fleet can catch among individual fishermen and not collectively.  The catch shares system is safer for the fishermen because it allows them to fish comfortably at their own pace during longer seasons. 

Next time you are lounging in your kayak fishing gel seat, or enjoying your own catch or purchase from your local seafood store, give a little thought to the tough men who work their heavy equipment in 20 foot seas in icy conditions.  So this holiday season give a gift of comfort and performance – give Skwoosh - the perfect gift for all sport fishermen.

TO CLIMB A TREE OR NOT TO CLIMB A TREE

In a recent article in The Wall Street Journal, William L. Hamilton talks about the latest fad in outdoor activity, tree climbing. According to Mr Hamilton "recreational tree climbing" is now "technical tree climbing" or climbing with ropes just like professional arborists do. What you did as a kid or "free climbing" is not encouraged as a sport. You've got to be kidding.

Can you imagine living in New York City, throwing a good rope, several carabiners, a saddle harness, a helmet, goggles and your trusty throw weight into a Macy's Big Brown Bag shopping bag, riding down the elevator in your building and heading straight for the New York Botanical Garden in the Bronx to climb a tree?

Classic Paddling Cushion

I prefer a strenuous workout out on the water in a kayak, canoe, sculler rowing or just some lazy fishing from my boat. I don't know about you but I'm a comfort hound when it comes to my recreation. I like to load my kayak on top of my car, drive a short way to a river, a lake or the ocean and put her in.
For paddling comfort I always have a Classic PADDLING GEL kayak cushion by SKWOOSH in my boat.

Pro Angler Kayak Gel Seat

When I decide to fish from my kayak I make sure that my SKWOOSH Tournament or Pro Angler kayak gel fishing seat is set up. Skwoosh lets me fish in comfort all day long.

Master Row Pad with AGP

When I'm in the mood for a vigorous workout I get into my one man scull, drop in my SKWOOSH Master gel row pad and get a 30 minute comfortable work out.


Suffice it to say I can pass up the 120 year old red oak for a comfortable paddle in my kayak with a SKWOOSH Gel Cushion any day.

The Field of Goals

The Field of Goals

Would anyone have predicted that number 1 LSU would play No 2 Alabama in the battle of the field goals? Whether you were sitting in the stadium in Tuscaloosa AL enjoying the comfort of your SKWOOSH bleacher gel seat or watching the game at your computer sitting comfortably on your SKWOOSH AirFlo Gel Office cushion you have to admit this game was a real stunner. After an unbelievable defensive struggle the game to get a step closer to the BCS title owes its outcome to Drew Alleman’s 25 yard field goal in overtime. This game will be remembered not because of Cade Foster’s 52 yard missed field goal (he missed three others) but it will go down in history as a 9 to 6 LSU win over the Crimson Tide where neither team ever reached the end zone.

I’ll bet a pair of SKWOOSH Bleacher Buddy gel seats or a comfortable kayak gel Paddling cushion that few out there can name another college football team that won a big game 9 to 6 while never getting the pigskin into the end zone.

Stay calm, relax, get in some kayak fishing and stay comfortable but always watch the NCAA game of the week sitting on your Gel Stadium seat. You might get to see a 30 to 27 game where no one scores a touchdown.

Skwoosh: Water Sports

Skwoosh: Water Sports

SKWOOSH CONUNDRUM(S)

Here's the Skwoosh conundrum.
After receiving numerous testimonials, like the one below, we are still concerned about over selling our pressure relief cushions in any medical or health cure environment. Our experience has shown that we are contacted by customers who are obviously searching for a "miracle" cure and are hoping to find the same in a Skwoosh cushion. We know that our gel really offers relief but certainly not in all cases. How do we capitalize on the effectiveness of TekPad without misleading or over promising that effectiveness to our customers? How do we communicate that Skwoosh generally works but may not be the answer to every customer's ailment or condition?
Then we have the case of the person who orders a Skwoosh and because of the cushions size, weight and thickness (our gel technology allows us to make Skwoosh thin so it does not look or feel like a thick foam pillow cushion) they return it immediately without giving it a fair evaluation. We understand that we can't please or solve everyone's problems but we know that we must continually search for the most efficient and effective way to communicate the virtues of Skwoosh to our potential customers.
Any ideas or comments?

Testimonial received and edited to hide the sender.

"Dear Skwoosh,

I want to thank you for rushing my order, (Order #1445). I received the Pro Traveler Seat Cushion yesterday. I tried it out at my computer and I would never had expected the results that I experienced.
I broke my hip on Sept. 1999. It healed and I thought I had no physical problems that related back to that. I spend many hours in front of my computer as I am a webmaster. Getting up from my chair my legs are stiff and they are not as flexible as they used to be. I thought I was getting osteoarthritis. Since I prefer to go the natural holistic approach to healing, I have taken nutritional supplements to help, to no avail.
After being by my computer for around an hour, sitting on my new skwoosh cushion I got up. I was shocked that I didn't have any stiffness and my walking was easy and smooth. Next I tried it when watching TV. Again I had the same result getting off my couch I discovered that my legs were flexible and not stiff.
As I told you, I am attending a convention in Sacramento California July 9-11, I leave on Thursday. My neighbor who is watching my dog, told me she will be ordering a cushion for herself as soon as I come back.
I am so impressed and grateful. I have added two links to your site and became an 'affiliate'.
Thank you for your kindness and assuring me that the cushion would come in time. Most of all thank you for helping me to get back my health.

Take care,"

NBA FINALS

After Game 2

The Boston Celtics vs. the Los Angeles Lakers, what a great NBA lineup? Rondo, Pierce and Allen vs. Kobe, Artest and Gasol just to name a few. We were on the edge of our gel comfort cushions throughout game one when the Celtics took a beating. The only comfort we had in the game one Celtic’s loss was our Skwoosh gel stadium seats. The pain was so great for us Boston fans we could have used the gel therapy cushion to relive some of the pressure as the Celtics failed to come from behind and ended up losing to the Lakers. Game 2 was another story. Keep the gel kayak seats and the comfortable gel motorcycle seats in reserve -we didn’t even need the gel Pillion pads in this game. Allen and Rondo energized the Celtics to a 103 – 94 win. It’s back to Boston for game 3 on June 8 (happy birthday Ted) and a great chance to pull ahead on home court. With a couple of days off the NBA guys should take a day off and do some kayak fishing and yes, we know how to get them comfortable while fishing. Better yet NBA management should address the $400 million loss the league experienced this past season. If Skwoosh had super stars like LeBron James and Kobe Bryant along with the Pro Angler gel fishing seat and the super Travel gel cushion we sure as heck wouldn’t loose $400 million. Maybe the NBA should reduce the number of games they play from the outrageous 82 down to something like 65 or 70. This would make each game a little more valuable and it might help to sustain interest and fill some of the empty seats. Take a page from the NFL playbook. With just a 16 game season every game counts, teams have to perform 110% in each game if they want to rank. The same goes for fans. With so few games fans have to get as many in as they can before the season is over. Go Celtics and bring it home.